There is one thing that has lit the fire under my bum to rush into finding a relationship fast. I know, I know. My past blogs have all been about not worrying about finding that perfect match, to enjoy yourself and take time to fully live life, but there is just this one exclusion that I long to have so bad, that at times I just want to throw in my single-white-flag and shout “Can this just happen already!” That thing is babies. I WANT BABIES! Yes, I know, I am only twenty and some would say that wanting a child at such a young age is preposterous. But have you ever known there was that one thing in life you were meant to be or do? Well for me, I believe I was born to be a mom. I cannot wait until that day. But although I want a baby bad, I realize that I am missing something pretty darn important in this equation. A man. But how important is that really? Although it would be ideal to fall in love with someone and have a child with him or her, to me it’s not so imperative. I know it takes one egg and one sperm to make a child, but do you really need both to raise one? 
Okay you are judging me. But when I picture my future, my kids, it is hard for me to envision a man standing next to me fulfilling the role as dad. Maybe it is because I grew up with such a shitty example of one, (blood wise of course. My step dad has done a good job), maybe its because I am lacking in the experience of being in love, or maybe I am just making excuses. For whatever reason I see girls out there bringing up their children alone, and I envy them. Calm down Mom, I am not planning on having any children anytime soon. It’s just a wish I have. One I know will happen one day, but for today I will daydream about the possibilities. The possibility of science figuring out a way to reconfigure my eggs to make a baby sperm free. No male component could be the best baby in the world. Just kidding of course. Don’t take this post the wrong way. I don’t hate men; I appreciate them and know that there are some amazing fathers out there. I just don’t know if I will find one in time to carry out my dream of having 8 children. Or that I even would want to share my parenting role with someone else. This is my view now, and I am sure that by the time I do have children it will change. But am I crazy? Are there others out there feeling the same way as me or can understand where I am coming from? Leave comments, help me ease my mind. Everything’ll Be Alright (Will’s Lullaby)- Joshua Radin
Perfectly Lonely 
What readers are saying